So to fill you all in on the "family situation" and put an end to my dramatic pause: one of Gary's grandmothers has pancreatic cancer that we discovered today has spread to her lungs. She was told that her only treatment could be chemotherapy possibly to extend her life but probably just to make her more comfortable. They are giving her six months - one year to live. This is a major blow to the entire family because she is an incredible woman. She is definitely the glue that holds everything together and I am deeply saddened by this news. To make things a lot sadder, her husband has Alzheimer's (which is fairly progressed) and I'm just not sure how their whole situation will work out. Adult-wise, there are three daughters with their husbands and Gary and I are the only adult grandchildren. We are going to visit her tomorrow and I'm sure it will be very emotional. This is especially hard of Gary because he's only lost one other person close to him. Unfortunately, death and I are old friends but it isn't exactly any easier. I have always been an extreme planner; so my first thoughts were "What will Thanksgiving and Christmas be like? I wonder if she'll live longer or if this is more progressed than they suspect..." I don't like to think of myself as a worrier, I just like to think ahead and consider how things will play-out.
Thank you all for your prayers. I don't want this note to have a defeated tone, which I'm seeing now that it does. I want to reaffirm that I believe that we serve a God that can heal anyone and do anything. I have not lost hope that He will heal her but if He chooses not to, I also want to be prepared for losing her. His plans are not often my plans but I recognize that it's much better that way in the long run.