Wednesday, April 20, 2011

family stuff can be difficult

I've been mulling over our recent family occurrence for a few days, and decided to write about it because getting it out and "on paper" always seems to make me feel better. I don't think I've mentioned very much about my sister-in-law on this blog, but that's probably because just thinking about her for the past two years creates a knot in my stomach. She's much younger than my husband and I (11 years) and going through those wonderfully awful teenage years. But as I remember my own teen years, I was at least sneaky when I was awful and I would have never been so blatantly bad in so many ways. I'm not expecting an award for making it through those years with my parents truly being oblivious, and to be honest, I never thought about being as rebellious as she is. It doesn't matter what I think of her, or how she's parented, because talking about those things would bring out the mean in me. The long and the short of it is that I don't want to be around her anymore and most importantly, I don't want my child around her. Maybe I am an over-protective parent, but that's my right. I don't care that my daughter isn't quite two, she's smart, and she's absorbing everything around her. And I refuse to put her around someone that dresses how she pleases, does what she pleases, is completely disrespectful, and gets into just about every kind of trouble I can think of. I'm not doing it anymore. And I know I hurt my mother-in-law, but I put my foot down anyway. I had to do what was best for my family. The good news: my sister-in-law is at boarding school through the week, so Lucy can still visit my in-laws and her uncles during that time. I don't think I could have taken her away from everyone unless the situation was much, much worse. I still love them and I hope they understand. My husband agrees with me, but he's also pretty worried about how his mom is taking it. I guess time will tell. The bad news: this year for Easter, we will be all alone. I suspect we'll attend the church we've been visiting for a few weeks and I'll bake a ham, but it just won't be the same. Of course, it wouldn't have been anyway, because Nana is gone, and her house was the destination for all holidays and family gatherings before. I miss her.

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